Posts Tagged ‘Social Media’

Top Ten Ways You Know Bin Laden was a Social Media Loser

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It’s ironic that the story of Bin Laden’s death was first broken on Twitter—especially since he was such a social media loser.

Top Ten Ways You Know Bin Laden
was a Social Media Loser

  1. He was literally “living in a cave” for years.
  2. He started a profile on Facebook, but there was no way to input more than one wife.
  3. His grandkids tried to get him on skype, but they could never verify with 100% certainty that it was really his voice.
  4. He gave up Twitter when he found out the 72 virgins who were following him were fake.
  5. He couldn’t figure out how to use Foursquare (Darn!).
  6. He wanted a smartphone—but his parents said he’d have to earn it by getting a real job.
  7. He gave up on email, because he kept getting “Your message cannot be sent to undisclosed recipients.”
  8. He tried playing Farmville, but then he realized HE was the animal.
  9. He tried a blog, but he forgot the password, and someone burned it with the trash.
  10. With that beard, who would have dated him on e-harmony anyway?

Anyone have any to add?

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Top 10 Ways You Know You’re a True Jewish Twit

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10. You tweet @YeahThatsKosher before making any reservations for dinner.

9. You sang Hatikva when @israel was purchased by the State of Israel.

8. Your biggest goal in life is to rank high on the #jta100 from @jtanews.

7. Tweets from @jewishbloggers fill your stream non-stop, but for some reason, you just can’t unfollow.

6. Your poskim are @dovbear @JYuter @e_fink, @noahroth and @MarkSoFla.

5. You’ve re-tweeted @JewishIdeas at least once.

4. Your favorite Jewish news source is @Daroff. Everyone else just repeats each other.

3. You were genuinely rejoicing for all of humanity when @EstherK got to #Limmud in the #snowstorm.

2. You’re wondering why @ELALUSA exists on #twitter if it’s not giving out free flights every day.

And the #1 way you know you’re a True Jewish Twit…

1. At least one Jews for Jesus dude is following you and you, um, don’t follow him back.

Can you add to this list? Comments welcome!

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